Planning a memorial service for a loved one who died during pandemic restrictions

If you were one of the nearly 20% of Americans who lost a relative or friend to COVID-19 (according to one source ), or for any reason during the pandemic, gathering restrictions and precautions may have prevented you from holding the kind of funeral that you wanted for them. Many families that we have worked with over the past year or so expressed the desire to hold a larger memorial service for their loved one once the pandemic eased.

As time passes, it may feel less urgent or necessary to hold a memorial service. But there is tremendous value in gathering to mark the passing from life to death of someone we love. Time spent reflecting on their life, honoring them and what they meant to you and others is an important part of your grief journey.

If you are thinking about holding a memorial service for someone who died during the pandemic restrictions, we’ve prepared some advice and ideas that may help. Please know that we are always available to assist you in making your plans.

1. Scheduling – Many families are choosing to schedule services on a special day like their loved one’s birthday or an anniversary. It might seem logical to hold it on a holiday when people may be off work, but that could conflict with other plans that people have made. If you are thinking about scheduling it on a holiday, consider publicizing service details well in advance.

2. Location – Depending on virus levels in the community, you might consider an outdoor location. Our funeral home continues to follow protocols for social distancing and cleaning for your safety, and if you would like to use our funeral home, please just give us a call to schedule.

3. Publicizing service details – While a service immediately following a death can be naturally publicized through the obituary, a newspaper listing, or word of mouth, it can be a little harder to get the word out for a service scheduled later. We suggest utilizing Facebook, email and text messaging to share details. You could certainly place a short newspaper notice, though there will be a charge from the newspaper for that. If you call us for assistance with planning the service, we’d be happy to help with this.

4. Sharing time - A time of sharing can be a wonderfully meaningful part of the memorial service. Sometimes right after a loss, it can be painful to hear even the sound of your loved one’s name, and hard to listen to others reminisce. But as time goes by, you may find yourself longing to hear someone say their name or share stories about them.

It can be a little hard to get this started, because most of us do not enjoy speaking up in crowds. One way to open up a sharing time is to ask the guests to raise their hands if they were a friend, co-worker, family member, club member, etc. of your loved one, or if they are there to support a surviving family member. This can help break the ice a bit and generate warmth in the room. You might also pull a more outgoing friend or family member aside before the service and ask them to go first. You can also ask those who cannot attend to send you their stories to read aloud during this time.

5. Technology – No matter when you have the service, chances are good that there will still be scheduling conflicts and guests who do not feel comfortable traveling or gathering. Consider asking a guest to livestream the service on Facebook or another platform. If you hold the service at our funeral home, we can help you with this.

Holding a memorial service is an important way to honor the life of your loved one. And, as some time has passed since your loved one's death, you may even find that the time spent planning the service can bring a measure of healing. If we can be of assistance, please give us a call.

June 16, 2025
“We travel, initially, to lose ourselves; and we travel, next to find ourselves.” – Pico Iyer Traveling can provide an insightful perspective into your life, but when you're grieving, that perspective often widens into something much more. Grief can be isolating and lonely. Traveling can serve as a reminder to yourself that there is a whole world out there outside of the walls of your home and familiar places that may remind you of your loss. A vacation may be the last thing on your mind. However, it can aid in your grieving journey by not forgetting that you are grieving but making it easier to remember good times with your loved one. We’ve come up with four ideal vacations to consider to enrich your heart and soul, melt away stress and have a deeply rejuvenating and meaningful adventure. The Cruise Vacation Being away at sea can be healing for grieving on both an emotional and health level. Nothing says adventure like booking a voyage and being whisked away on a ship to forget about real life for a week or so. On a cruise, you’ll be waited on hand and foot and have access to food around the clock, on board entertainment and an environment of elegance and fun. Plenty of sunshine gives your body a Vitamin D dose, which boosts the immune system and offers natural anti-depressants from positive endorphins. Fresh ocean water also produces positive mental function and respiratory health. As a big plus, there are cruise packages for every budget. You can book anything from a quick 3-day cruise to Mexico or the Caribbean, to a 14-day Alaskan or Mediterranean voyage. The Therapeutic Vacation While there is a time for adventure, for some the grieving journey calls for complete relaxation. In this case, an all-inclusive resort package in a tropical location may work wonders. Perhaps a more budget-friendly option is a getaway to a cabin or bed and breakfast? Many people choose to book stays specializing in therapeutic relaxation and spa treatments. All of these are awesome options if you want to lower the cortisol levels in your body and enjoy the soothing relaxation of treating yourself. In the United States, locations like Colorado Springs, Colorado, and Asheville, North Carolina can offer plenty of rest and relaxation. If you’re thinking of adding stamps to your passport, the Icelandic or Irish countryside can rejuvenate you. The Physical Activity Vacation Many people choose to grieve by engulfing themselves into rigorous physical activity. This is a great way to de-stress while improving your health and adding years to your life. Some people might choose vacations with world-class fitness centers or challenges, while others prefer to embark on natural physical challenges including climbs, hikes, and trails. Climbing Japan’s Mt. Fuji not only to physically exert yourself but also to boost your emotional health through confronting and conquering a challenge. You’ll have stories for life when you decide to explore natural rainforests or go kayaking through British Columbia or New Zealand. The Sight-Seeing Vacation Taking in breathtaking monuments, structures or natural wonders do a lot to expand your horizons and touch your emotions. These vacations work to put life and the world into perspective, which is essential in any grief journey. There are countless sights and landmarks to see. A trip to check out the Grand Canyon, Eiffel Tower, New York Skyscrapers, Swiss Alps, Great Wall of China, Pyramids of Africa and the list goes on. You can’t go wrong with any of these vacations. Comb through them to see which touch your heart and fill needs that will help your mental, physical and spiritual health.
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